Its been a while since I last updated my blog , been going through emotional turmoil . I feel sick inside and confused . I wish I understood the world sadly I don't and I wish I knew why ?I wish I understood why the things are the way they are it seems like each year that passes the world is getting worse . Is that just my imagination sometimes I think I'm deluding myself . I'm uncertain of myself and what I want may Allah bring it make it clear to me.I feel irritated by Muslims and upset with the world as a whole ....if that make sense to anyone ? I think were has the mercy gone ? where!? .Where has the wisdom gone ? Muslims these days don't seem very wise ....each and every one of them has their own little opinion on life and Islam .May Allah make me understand one day , may Allah make things clear for me one day ameen .
Up until a few weeks ago I realized how much I relied on a certain someone in my life , well that person has gone now . I must stand on my two feet it will be hard at first but inshallah it'll get easier .I will finally learn to cope with 'me' .I wish I can come out of my fantasy world ..just be in reality I'm constantly day dreaming about the way I wish things where . GET OVER IT ..I keep telling myself . but then slip right back in to the same mood of day dreaming . ever since I can remember I'd always day dreame in school where I would practically fall asleep in assembly because of my day dreaming .Back then I saw life so very simple now I see all the complications. If I could I would want to be a teenager again and just be blissfully ignorant . OK so ignorance isn't so blissful at time what you do know will certainly help you get through situations . I guess the feelings I'm going through right now is feelings of not feeling stable inside and not secure from within. Alot of uncertainty about all the things that is happening all around me .
I'm going to stop rambling now and just beg Allah to please make things clear for me ameen .
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5 comments:
Asalaamu alaikoum sister
I am sorry you are having a hard time right now. May Allah ease your pain.
Most ppl go thru what you are experiencing, you are not alone sister.
Simply, just get this point that the universe has its owner and you are not owner of the world. Every person has a story of life written since years before his creation. It is you who can change it by trust on God. If you are the only person who understand, keep your way, you be good. Try to be patient more.. Stay away from negative, jealious, unhappy person. Stay happy and cheerful. Get happy for simple things. Everyday learn something new. Forgive yourself and Don't loose way of LoVe. Then it will be OK to cry when you feel bad, for you are human and need to release your bad energy. By now remember shoulder of Shahrzad always ready for you to cry on..
Assalamu alykum
InshAllah things will be more clear for you sis & May Allah help you get through this tough time.
No matter who leaves you, walks out on you, disappears etc Allah swt will always be there for you no matter what.
We all daydream at times, it’s nothing to be worried about however if you day dream allot it means you have time on your hands…maybe keep yourself busy reading, helping others or whatever lol.
And I tend to think the opposite, most young Muslims MashAllah seem very intelligent…the ones I’ve seen. Hmmm
Anyways, Take care - hope your ok.
sino muslim - I dont actualy have empty time , I'm learning to design and sew , I read and write ect ..and have my house and duaghter to take care of ..this is just my charactor I want to change it though because it gets tiring .
shahrazad- thanks for that , that was very sweet of you to say :)
agadir_girl- I know most people have gone through what I have gone through yet I dont feel its that way I feel its just me the weirdo .
As Salaamu ALaikum Sis:
Insh'Allah sis, you will find a way out through the guidance of Allah. You are not alone in this feeling of desperation. Preocuupy yourself with something else and don't allow depression to take over you. We all have hardships, but remember these are all tests from Allah. "For every hardship, there is ease." Hang in there my sister.
ummabdurrahman.wordpress.com
p.s. you are a very talented writer, Mash'Allah. Keep the thoughts flowing.
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